Holistic Help to Ease Grief

This blog was prompted by the recent loss of an amazing woman - Sarah Fisher

Holistic Help to Ease Grief

I am still struggling to comprehend the loss of our vibrant friend and put into words all she taught, shared and the profound effect she had on both my life, my dogs and practice. Grief can often be quite isolating, but with Sarah it has been collective and drawn everyone together, just like she did in life. I feel privileged to have spent time with her and have some wonderful memories.

Arthur Golden who wrote Memoirs of a Geisha once said, “Grief is a most peculiar thing; we’re so helpless in the face of it. It’s like a window that will simply open of its own accord. The room grows cold, and we can do nothing but shiver. But it opens a little less and a little less, each time”

Right now it feels like that window is wide open the whole time, ACE is such an integral part of my daily routine, that my emotions are being triggered constantly. I have found myself reaching for various holistic methods and wanted to share some here, in the hope that they may help others. As our dogs are so deeply connected to us they will sense our grief and depth of emotion too, so may wish to self-select some of the herbs and essential oils mentioned.

Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) is a great way to deal with the plethora of emotions that bulldoze their way through the brain throughout the day; disbelief, denial, shock, anger, confusion, sadness, overwhelm, senselessness to name a few, as well as helping with physical symptoms such as nausea, sleep disturbances, stress and exacerbation of existing pain.

Studies have shown that cortisol can be 30 x higher following a loss, so I have included some essential oils and herbs that support the adrenals, as well as those for grief.

Essential oils

For initial grief

Marjoram (Origanum Majorana) relaxing, gives emotional support, helpsnervous exhaustion

Rose (Rosa spp.) sedative, nurtures, promotes self-love and forgiveness, calms the Heart & ‘Shen’, soothes nerves, eases anger and depression

Benzoin (Benzoin Styrax) Anti-inflammatory, eases separation anxiety and reactivity due to physical or emotional scars

Jasmine (Jasminum officinalis) soothing opens the heart to new hope and deflames anger, Eases insecurity, nervousness and separation anxiety, antidepressant, relaxing, calming and comforting, strengthens the Heart and the ‘Shen’

Persistent grief

Cypress (Cupressus Sempervirens)eases grief, timidity and overwhelm, calming

Frankincense (Boswellia Carteri) eases anxiety, restlessness, depression, anti-inflammatory, analgesic, can ease the transition to spirit

Myrrh (Commiphora myrrha) gives a sense of inner stillness and peace, eases sorrow and grief, depression

Bergamot (Citrus Bergamia) anti-inflammatory, analgesic, calming, sedative, eases frustration and irritability, lifts mood

Sadness and confusion

Neroli (Citrus aurantium) anxiety, stress, nervousness, digestive disorders with an emotional origin, helps with shock, loss, sadness, allows the heart to release

Clary Sage (Salvia Sclarea) eases anxiety, fear, claustrophobia and depression, sedative, anti-inflammatory

Melissa (Melissa officinalis) also a herb, eases anxiety, nervousness, hyperactivity, confusion, depression, balances the ‘Shen’ and the ‘Hun’

Pink grapefruit (Citrus x paradisi) enhances connection, uplifting, relieves stress, anxiety, lethargy, depression and nervous exhaustion

Palmarosa (Cymbopogon martinii ) emotional upset

Cistus (Cistus ladaniferus) nervous exhaustion, adrenal exhaustion, emotional detachment

Lavender (Lavendula augustifolia) reduces stress, nervousness, shyness and shock, calms the ‘Shen’

Elderflower (Sambucus nigra) only available as a hydrosol or herb, emotionally it can release anger and heavy emotions, allowing the heart to reconnect after a trauma, good for endings and beginnings, grounding

Herbs

If unfamiliar with herbs, the simplest way for humans to use them is to infuse into a tea or offer them to your animals for self-selection. Herbs, though natural, are a powerful remedy which can interact with other medications, so do not use without consultation.

Chamomile (Anthemis Nobilis) calms the mind and body, eases anxiety and separation anxiety, anti-inflammatory, analgesic

St Johns Wort (Hypericum perforatum) available as a herb or hydrosol, restores and tones nerves, pain reliever, anxiety, tension, depression, sedative

Linden (tilia spp), heart shaped leaves lifts tension worry helps sleep lowers anxiety, calming Hawthorn berry (Crataegus, spp.) member of rose family, balancing, reduces stress within cardiovascular system,

Mimosa bark (albizia julibrissin) depression, heartache, loss, uplifting, stress, insomnia

Holy basil (Ocimum tenuiflorum) part of the mint family, increases energy, helps feelings of hopelessness, helps you to express yourself, associated with the throat chakra, feeling choked, restores nervous system

Borage (Borago offininalis) lifts the spirit, gives courage

Wood betany (Stachys betonica) relaxant, restorative to nervous system, difficulty controlling emotions

Skullcap leaves (scutellaria lateriflora) anxiety, racing thoughts, panic, fear

Ashwaghanda (Withania somnifera) relieves stress and anxiety, elevates GABA levels, supports the adrenal and immune system, anti-inflammatory, analgesic, sedative

Astragalus root (Astragalus mongholicus) supports the adrenal and immune system, anti-inflammatory

Schisandra Berry (Schisandra chinesis) supports adrenals which are overworked during stressful times

Crystals

Smoky quartz grounding, helps release overwhelming emotion

Amethyst offers comfort with sadness and grief, easing the pain of losing or being parted from a loved one, is calming

Rose quartz opens the heart, encourages calm

Amazonite balances moods relieves stress anxiety and depression, stimulates serotonin release

Jet emotionally it is grounding, helps the grieving process and boosts intuition and spirituality, Queen Victoria wore a Jet necklace continuously after the death of Prince Albert.

Apache tears eases the emotional and physical pain of grief and loss

Malachite calming, stress relieving and can release trauma

Angelite allows self-expression and acceptance

Rainbow tourmaline is a powerful emotional healer

Lepidolite stone of transition, calming, soothing, it alleviates anxiety, depression, grief, clears energetic blockages

Both Bach Flower remedies and Homeopathy take the individual into account as well as the symptoms, so it is worth consulting a practitioner who specialises in these modalities, but I mention a few of them here as they are great remedies. The first thing I did was reach for my Arnica and Aconite.

Bach Flower remedies

Star of Bethlehem for grief, profound sorrow and shock (this is also one of the remedies in Rescue Remedy)

Olive exhaustion, drained

Gorse hopelessness despair, shut down

Honeysuckle grief, difficulty adapting to change

Willow resentment, bitterness, anger

White chestnut, obsessive worrying, spiralling thoughts, unable to sleep

Homeopathy

Arnica when grief is accompanied by shock

Aconite for shock and where there is fear, anxiety and restlessness

Ignatia amara initial grief

Natrum muriaticum (Nat Mur) deep silent grief held inside

Pulsatilla grief with feelings of abandonment

It is important to be aware of safety and any possible contraindications with conditions or medications when using botanicals for yourself or with your dog. Do your own research and consult a botanical practitioner if unsure. Holistic therapies do not replace medical or veterinary care.